September 29 2012 redux

Put on your mask.

Keep everyone at bay while you face yourself, fearlessly fearlessly.

This autumn is not like all the rest.

The place you find yourself, the people you choose.

Choose once and for good.

See yourself see yourself illuminated like a leaf on a lightbox

a simple skeleton, heart squeezing muscular spasm, and if the value is not in what you said, and if the value is not physical

and if the voyage has never been simple, if simplicity is the religion of recognition, if simplicity comes when you know the answer is yes. Yes above all others I will chose that, choose them come what may.

Knowing that ‘what may’ will come. You don’t know.

Knowing the answer is no. Walking into the wind or nothing so romantic, just walking around the corner always weedy grass through the cracks.

Come what may you could never be that, do that.

Knowing that there is no easy answer that you will twist in psychic spiderwebs with these people until you die, that whatever cords are cut, it’s a joke, a joke with no punch line.

Manufactured indifference is real, as real as real indifference; no you don’t care anymore. Once upon at time, a time still breathing as you move on, move past, light years beyond. Someone who embodied all the hope… all the hope there was at the time, all the light in the sky.

That you never really trusted anyone, that the lies were you just lying to you, telling a story about if you were really there, if this was really happening.

A tiny voyage from the table to the chair to the bath to the table, out to the store and back, the lives of ants, and our lives, starring at a sunset.

You can’t touch. No matter how close, no matter how close your face to mine.

The permutations are myriad, but the idea is simple.

Look now at who you have been.

Oh the road curves right here. Who will walk with you?

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