I thought I would come on and do a post about expressing anger.
I was just saying unexpressed anger turns to depression and hopelessness, but honestly, what does expressed ANGER turn into? Hatred and being all alone because everyone thinks you are an anti-social f*ckface? Errr, No.
It’s ok to be angry. This one took me a long time to learn. I thought I had to be cool with everything no matter the cost to me personally. It was a point of pride. Ugh! So Ugly to think you have to be a robot to be accepted by others. Getting angry mostly means you got hurt. You got hurt because you have feelings, you have feelings because you are ALIVE. You are privileged enough to have an inner response to outer stimuli. YAY! This is a good thing. Thank God. Thank God you can feel it.
The best thing to do with your anger, is to pal up to it. Don’t be scared of your own anger, it’s just you. AND YOU ARE PISSED. Awesome. How come? Why ? Oh wow, there is usually a story there, and often it’s a keeper. So much to learn about what makes you want to kill. What are you frightened of?
Sometimes people are just asshats. They are selfish, heartless and cruel, If people are awful is that your problem? Why no, no it’s not. Can you fix it? Again no. You can’t change anyone who is not you, and the more you can accept it, ultimately the better you will feel.
After all, they have to be them. and you get to be you.
(I say ultimately because there can be a lot of grieving to go through to completely let go of the idea that you can save or help or fix people you really love, people who don’t want to be fixed. It helps if you can see trying to save the person as arrogance. It’s their life. No really. It’s theirs.)
Other people do boring Bad Things, they get in your way, they break your stuff . Is it about the broken stuff? Well sort of, yes, and it’s about the disrespect, amiright? So ok. Next Step:
Communicating your anger to the proper recipient. You know what this is. KEY
You have to simply tell them what pissed you off.
There is a catch, you have to do it without being an assh*le. Your sentence must not start with “You are such a fucking f*ckface because…” Trust me, I know from experience, no one will listen to anything you say after that.
Why is this so terrifying?
Perhaps it is scary because if you do it in such a way that allows them to respond openly, you may find out you are wrong. You are unrealistic, misguided, uptight, and coming completely from left field.
You gotta make space for that possibility.
….and finally it’s important to recognize that in dealing with your anger, you will at some point let go of it, and that can be lonesome. Anger makes us feel right, and feeling right is awesome. Anger keeps us warm. It lets us act almost like a really crummy friend, who just goes along with everything Anger says, taking absolutely no responsibility “That’s right Anger, what the f*uck were they thinking?! Man, those fucking assh*oles never f*cking stop to think.”
So, as long as you are angry, you are not thinking, you are feeling, and as deep emotional truths demand to be heard, you had better express them. Howevs you best be ready for the fact that they may, or may not pass the logic meter. They so don’t have to. You can say them anyway. You can say wow, I don’t make sense, but it’s so true for me. I wonder why? It’s ok if you don’t makes sense. Tell someone how you really feel.